學(xué)會包容支持他人【中英對照】

　　當(dāng)我們遇到煩惱、障礙時，如果沒有方法，人生就會變得黑暗，像開車失去了方向一樣迷茫。我們面對一個問題，要了解它的來源、追溯它的本質(zhì)，才有解決問題的機會。有了正確的方法，人生才會獲得光明。

　　A correct approach is needed when we face the various obstacles and frustrations of life. Otherwise, life will become dark and gloomy, much like driving in unknown territory. To resolve an issue, we need to trace it back to its origin and understand its nature. A correct approach is key to living a bright life.

　　所有事相與問題，都有它的共性與本質(zhì)——平等性就是它的本質(zhì)。因為所有事相都有其作用力的展現(xiàn)，但無有實質(zhì)。

　　All phenomena and problems share the same, universal nature: equality. They are but manifestations of this nature without essence.

　　昨天發(fā)生的事情、幾年前發(fā)生的事情，不管好的、壞的，發(fā)生時都有其作用力。有的事情讓人痛苦，有的事情讓人喜悅，但發(fā)生了，即結(jié)束了，無有實質(zhì)。像我們做的夢一樣，在夢中什么事都發(fā)生過，但醒來除了記憶以外，什么事也沒留下。因為一切如夢，所以平等。

　　All things that happened in the past, be it yesterday or years ago, for good or bad, incurred an impact, bringing pleasure or suffering. These things ceased to exist at the very moment they occurred, leaving nothing behind. No essence can be found. Just like in our dreams, anything can happen. But after we wake up, nothing is left but memory. All phenomena and problems are equal because they are all as illusory as a dream.

　　我們認(rèn)清了這個平等性——就是所有事相、所有生命的共同本質(zhì)，我們依止這個本質(zhì)，或者透過事相來了解其本質(zhì)，就可以在生活中去實踐、去解決我們所遇到的種種問題。在這個共性平等的基礎(chǔ)上，才能真正地相互尊重，交流、包容、理解、支持的機會就會增多。相反，鄙視、輕視、不在意（就是不尊重）、領(lǐng)導(dǎo)別人、要求別人、控制別人，就會產(chǎn)生傷害。

　　We should understand that this equality is the universal nature of all phenomena and life. By relying on this nature, or by understanding the nature through a phenomenon, we can practice this approach and solve a large variety of problems in our lives. Based upon this universal equality, we can enjoy real mutual respect, thus the opportunities of mutual communication, tolerance, understanding and support will increase accordingly; on the opposite, contempt, disdain, and carelessness shows disrespect. Leading, demanding and controlling others will inflict pain.

　　支持別人，就是在別人的思想、作為中，去補充他人的不足，使他人的不足逐漸完善、健康起來，只給予有效果的、具體的、輕松的方法，不期盼回報，不強制對方接納。

　　To support someone means to supply and nurture other people’s mindset and actions in an effective, feasible, and gentle manner, make up for what they are short for, and help others improve themselves.  Support must be offered with no expectation of compensation and must be received voluntarily.

　　我們在支持別人的過程中，往往容易借助＂對別人好＂的理由去要求別人，背后其實是控制，這不是真正的支持。像做父母的經(jīng)常會按自己的要求去強制孩子聽自己的話，理由很充分——“都是為孩子好"，但結(jié)果其實是讓孩子聽話，一旦（事情）違背自己的意愿就埋怨、委屈。這不是支持，而是自己的私心罷了。真正的支持，就是在尊重的基礎(chǔ)上給予孩子恰當(dāng)?shù)姆椒�，引�?dǎo)孩子對因果的觀察，令孩子有個反思，去承擔(dān)自己應(yīng)該承擔(dān)的責(zé)任，令其從事相的執(zhí)著中解脫出來。

　　Usually, while we claim to support others, we tend to dominate them under the pretext of good intentions, such as “I’m only trying to help”。 Our innermost thought is domination which is not genuine support. For example, some parents often demand that their children listen to them. They might claim to have sufficient reason to do so, saying “it’s for your own good”。 But once their children go against their will, parents will complain or feel wronged. This is not real support but a selfish act. Real support is based upon respect to empower children with the right approach and the capacity to observe the law of cause and consequence, then to help them reflect on and take responsibility of their own actions. Through this way, parents help their children free themselves from excessive attachment to all phenomena.

　　不光是家庭，我們的這個時代都需要包容與支持。包容，是理解、許可任何人有不同的角度、想法；支持，是給予恰當(dāng)?shù)姆椒ǎ�去幫助別人從煩惱、習(xí)慣、迷失中走出來。這與控制、要求完全會產(chǎn)生不同的結(jié)果。我們可以去不斷地對比、深思、觀察，來了解這些方法，應(yīng)用實踐在我們?nèi)粘Ｉ�活中，不斷地使這些可執(zhí)行、可操作的方法在我們的生命中發(fā)揮它的積極作用。

　　Not only our families but also our times need more tolerance and support. Tolerance means understanding and allowing others to have a different perspective or idea. Support means offering the right way to help others free themselves from troubles, habits and confusion. These attitudes are different from control and demand, and will generate opposite results. By constant comparison, in-depth thinking and observation, we will come to learn and apply these doable approaches in our everyday life, improving life for the better.

　　包容、支持，是生命本質(zhì)平等性的作用力的展示；控制、要求，也是生命本質(zhì)的作用力的展示，但控制、要求所產(chǎn)生的煩惱、傷害會把平等性的本質(zhì)遮蔽或埋沒了。

　　Tolerance and support are the manifestations of the equal nature of life; so are control and demand. However, the latter are different from the former in that they cause anxiety and inflict harm, which deter and obstruct people from discovering this equal nature.

　　我們能從事相中認(rèn)清并回歸到平等的本質(zhì)上，人就會在包容、支持等這些應(yīng)該作為的地方多去作為，在控制、要求等不應(yīng)該作為的地方去調(diào)整，去回歸。不強化事相的高低、對錯、善惡而迷失于其中，回到本質(zhì)就平等了、清凈了。

　　After we have a clear understanding of and return to this equal nature through phenomena, we will spend more efforts on what we should do such as being tolerant and supportive, and try hard to adjust what we shouldn’t do such as control and demand and return to the universal nature. We should not strengthen the duality of phenomena such as high and low, right and wrong, good and bad, thus we will not get lost. We will be equal and pure when we go back to the nature.

　　原標(biāo)題：學(xué)會包容支持他人 【 中英對照 】

　　文章轉(zhuǎn)自微信公眾號：菩提眼